Confused & disappointed

That's confused and disappointed as in "I'm not cross, but...."

My body is NOT behaving. After my hopeful moment, I continued to spot until I eventually marked it up as light flow on fertility friend and gave up til next month. I was pretty gutted, as at only 7 days, it's my first under 10 day luteal phase in months. I really thought I'd cracked it... Particularly cruel when we'd got the timing so perfect this month.

So I had a day of spottingish lightish flowish bloody something(ish) and now I'm back to barely spotting. So I've changed my mind and marked it back as spotting.

It's only day 9, and my temp went up again this morning so I did a test mainly because I could rather than with any kind of hope, but it was negative. I'm guessing my temps will drop properly in the next couple of days and I'll either have a proper period or I'll have to assume that I had an odd month and am already mid-cycle.

I guess I'll just have to wait a few more days and see, but I would have thought that if the bleeding was implantation it would have been a long enough wait for a faint line on a sensitive test. I'm no longer statistically pregnant, and I'm probably not actually pregnant either. I've already pretty much given up on this cycle, so just want to get to the nexy one so I know this a blip, not a return to short luteal phase.

Statistically pregnant

Yesterday I had a REALLY high temp for me, at 37.0... It was followed yesterday evening by a gush of bright red blood when I went to the loo. Obviously I'm hoping it was implantation spotting, but I thought that was pinky brown usually, and I didn't expect so much. I was unsure whether to mark it as start of next cycle! And of course 5dpo may well be too early. Although as I fell pregnant last time with only a 6 day luteal phase my experience suggests otherwise.

So I did what I always do in this situation. I mither on fertility friend. Having read the detailed interpretation of my chart over and over (too early to know... go figure), I head to the statistical part of the site, which is far more open to wild speculation.

Normally, I get about a 35% likelihood of pregnancy based on charts like mind, and only matching ovulation date. It rises to about 40% with good timing. If I try to match on pre or post ovulation temperatures, I usually don't see any results or the probabilities plummet.

Today when I checked I had a 50% probability of pregnancy based on ovulation date and timing. So I chanced matching post ovulation temps too, and the odds went up to 80%. What about charts that matched my pre o temps too? 100% pregnant charts. Only 2 charts in total, but that's good odds right?

So statistically I must be pregnant. Statistically, I am due in December...

Statistically, statistics are unreliable. Only a few more days til I can test.

4dpo... Early insanity

<p>Our timing was perfect this month. The only day we missed was O+1, which I'm not convinced has an effect anyway. Even <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1c3ea5">fertility friend</a> gave us a "high" for our efforts.</p>
<p>This all means we're going bit insane, counting magpies and seeing signs. I'm still struggling to really believe it will ever happen, but wishes are so strong that the insanity of the 2 week wait seems worse, not better this month. I'm left desperately hoping there aren't any signs to cling on to as I think it might actually send me over the edge.